I’ve never hidden the fact that I have depression. Its
always been something I have been very open about on my blog, in the hopes that
by talking about it, I can encourage others to be open and ask for the help
they may need.
Sometimes as a parent I need some time to myself. I love to
take some time to unplug from the world and look after myself and my mental
health. There are certain things that I love to do in this time and the main
one is to come away from social media and even my blog which can be extremely
hard as I work really hard to try so that my blog succeeds. I try and have a
regular upload schedule but when I’m in that bad place mentally I feel so much
pressure to keep that up and generally get overwhelmed so, for now, I just upload
if and when I can. My mental health is far more important than getting views.
Life, in general, can be overwhelming for me. I work full time
(Although I now only work 4 days, not 5 – still full-time hours) and have a
three-year-old. Lately, I’ve been feeling really alone as Sam works shifts and I
have just been feeling like he's not here and I’m doing it all on my own. I
honestly salute all single parents doing it on their own, because it's not easy.
I know it will get better – We have been doing this for almost 3 years now and
I’ve just been struggling a little lately with the shifts Sam’s been working.
Social media I find really hard when I’m in that dark place.
Seeing every perfect life and happy faces make me feel worse every time. I’ve
learned to stay away now.
When I’m feeling bad I always love a long soak in the bath.
I love baths and always have. When Sam and I first moved in together he was
shocked at how long I could spend in the bath – sometimes reading whole books
in there or watching 3 or 4 episodes of a Netflix show, but its always been a great
a way for me to relax. When I’m having a down day a bath helps me to relax too. I
also find something soothing in the fact I get out completely clean, no matter
if I’ve had a shower that morning or what there is something about getting into
the bath feeling dirty and getting out feeling completely clean and that helps –
maybe it’s a mental thing?
Getting out of the house is something I always struggle with
when I’m down but I always try and get out even if its to nip to the shop. I’m
often found on my days off wandering around the city center or our local
shopping center. Feeling trapped in the house makes everything seem a lot worse
and it reminds me of being on maternity leave with Harry and I worry that I’ll
go back to being that bad so I try to leave the house once every day.
Keeping busy is key when I’m feeling down but can also make everything
overwhelming – I still struggle to find the balance and fingers crossed I will
do soon!
The number one thing I try to do is talk about how I'm feeling. Whether it be chatting with Sam, who has been with me through plenty of my 'episodes', or my mum I find that talking about it really does help
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